Water Quotes In Humor - Lewis Black
"Aquafina, I think it means the end of water as we know it." ~ Lewis Black.
The Wisdom of The H2O Humor Of Lewis Black
Lewis Black, the comedic genius known for his razor-sharp tongue, has a unique ability to unearth profound truths buried beneath layers of absurdity. A perfect example of this is his humorous take on bottled water, specifically his hilarious line about Aquafina:
"Aquafina, I think it means the end of water as we know it."
At first glance, this may seem like a throwaway joke, something Black says in passing while working himself into a trademark rage over the ridiculousness of modern life. But in reality, this line is packed with irony, cultural commentary, and even a dose of philosophical insight. Let’s break down the genius of this joke and what it reveals about our relationship with the elixir of life, consumerism, and modern life.
The Rise of H2O In A Bottle: A Symbol of Modern Absurdity
To understand the true weight of Black's joke, we need to examine the rise of bottled H2O in our society. It’s a phenomenon that, on its surface, seems laughably unnecessary. After all, H2O is the most abundant resource on Earth. It falls from the sky, flows from rivers, and is available at virtually every public tap. But somewhere along the line, a genius marketer realized that we could sell this ubiquitous resource in plastic bottles, turning something free and essential into something that could be commodified. This story of h2o privatization, brought about in the bottled h2o industry, was highlighted in the ground breaking film Tapped.
According to the Tapped Wikipedia Page
"Tapped looks into the bottled water industry and its long-term effects socially, economically and ecologically. The filmmakers focused on industry giants such as PepsiCo and Nestlé Waters, visiting a town containing a Nestlé factory as well as running tests on the bottles the company uses for its products. Their results came back showing "several potentially harmful chemicals, some known carcinogens". The documentary also focused on the number of bottles that are recycled, noting that "Forty percent of bottled water is really just filtered tap water, and every day we throw away 30 million single-served bottles of water as plastic waste."
Enter Aquafina, one of the most recognizable brands of bottled water in the world. Then, enter Lewis Black, one of world's best known rant comics. The comedy of Lewis Black points much needed attention onto the sarcastic hilarity of the bottled water scam.
Aquafina, like many of its competitors, doesn't come from some rare, pristine mountain spring. No, it's just tap water that has been filtered—often to the point where it barely contains any minerals, nutrients, or taste. And yet, somehow, people are willing to pay a premium for this glorified, purified tap water. Black’s joke captures this absurdity perfectly: the very thing we once took for granted, something we didn’t think twice about, has now been packaged, branded, and sold as though it’s a luxury item.
According to Marion Nestle, professor emeritus of nutrition, food studies and public health at New York University,
“Bottled water is tap water. Companies buy water from municipal supplies at very low cost and sell it back to the public at a huge markup, I am not aware of any evidence that bottled water is safer than city water in places where cities take care of their water.”
Lewis Black’s line subtly points out the ridiculousness of this H2O scam. We’ve gone from the natural, unpretentious idea of water as a universal right to an environment where we’re conditioned to believe that H2O, a fundamental part of life, needs to be sold in bottles with fancy labels. And not just any bottles - often, we’re talking about single-use plastic, which brings us to the environmental catastrophe lurking behind this trend.
The Environmental Paradox: Aquafina and the Plastic Problem
There’s a layer of dark irony embedded in Black’s joke that speaks to the personal and global environmental destruction caused by the bottled H2O industry. Aquafina and other bottled agua brands don’t just provide H2O in a bottle; they contribute massively to the global plastic crisis. Each year, millions of tons of plastic bottles end up in landfills, lakes, oceans, and ecosystems, where they take centuries to decompose. Yet, somehow, people are still willing to purchase plastic wrapped H2O, thinking it’s a cleaner, healthier option.
The fact that Aquafina’s H2O comes from a municipal source - essentially the same tap aqua that you could drink for free - adds an extra layer of absurdity to this entire situation. As Black points out, it’s not just H2O that’s being sold, but a narrative. It’s a narrative that convinces us we need this “premium” product, even though the product itself is nothing more than filtered h2o from the tap. So when Black says, the end of water as we know it, he’s not just talking about H2O being turned into a commodity. He’s pointing to the end of a world where something so essential was once free and easily accessible.
The Irony of Luxury and Convenience
In many ways, bottled adam's ale has become a symbol of modern convenience and luxury, which is another reason why Black’s joke resonates. In a world that increasingly values convenience over all else, bottled wawa has become a status symbol, albeit one drenched in irony. People have willingly turned the elixir of life - a basic necessity - into a symbol of affluence, not because of its quality, but because of its branding and the convenience of having it in a bottle.
Sansone Europa Stainless Steel NSF Certified Water Dispenser Fusti 15 Liter / 3.96 Gallon
$299.95
Finally a stainless steel water dispenser worthy of your water and worthy of your style. Welcome to our Sansone Europa Stainless Steel NSF Certified Water...… read more
Aquafina, along with its competitors, has made something as simple as quenching your thirst feel like a high-end activity. But the fact that the H2O in the bottle is indistinguishable from the stuff that comes out of a tap undercuts the entire premise. And as Black humorously points out, it’s essentially the end of aqua “as we know it” - because what was once free, universal, and unpretentious has been transformed into a marketing gimmick. What’s next? Bottled air? Oh wait, that's a thing in certain parts of the world. But I digress.
A Reflection of Consumerism
Beyond the specific case of bottled H2O, Black’s joke speaks to the larger issue of consumerism that pervades every aspect of modern life. Our culture has become increasingly obsessed with consumption - consuming goods, services, experiences, and even ideas. And we do it all with a sense of entitlement, as though it’s our right to have access to everything, no matter the environmental or societal cost.
The bottled H2O industry, with Aquafina as a prime example, is a perfect microcosm of this mindset. We’ve been sold a narrative that we deserve access to perfectly purified H2O, even though that H2O is basically the same as the wet stuff flowing through our taps. And yet, we’re willing to pay more for the illusion of purity, health, and exclusivity. The idea of aqua being a luxury item, Black suggests, is the pinnacle of this ridiculous consumer culture, where necessity has been converted into indulgence.
The Wisdom of Lewis Black: The End Our Relationship To The Wet Stuff
So, what exactly does Lewis Black mean when he says Aquafina represents the end of water as we know it? It’s a statement laced with sarcasm, but it also carries a truth about how we’ve changed our relationship with natural resources and the world around us.
H2O, once an element that symbolized life itself, has now been reduced to something we buy, sell, and package for profit. The purity of H2O the very essence of what makes it vital to human survival, has been transformed into a commodity, something we can’t experience without a price tag attached.
Black's joke is a perfect reminder of the absurdity of modern life. As we race toward a future where even our most basic needs are commodified, we must ask ourselves whether this is really the world we want. Are we willing to let everything we take for granted, like clean, fresh H2O, be reduced to just another product on a supermarket shelf?
In the end, Lewis Black’s joke offers a chance for reflection—a humorous and pointed critique of how far we’ve come (or perhaps, how far we’ve fallen) in our obsession with convenience, consumerism, and the commodification of the world’s most essential resource. And if nothing else, it gives us something to laugh about while we sit in a world where bottled aqua is marketed as luxury. So, next time you reach for an Aquafina, you might want to take a moment to ask: Is this the end of water as we know it - or is it just the beginning of something far stranger?
Lewis Niles Black, (born August 30, 1948) is an American stand-up comedian and actor. His comedy routines often escalate into angry rants about history, politics, religion, and cultural trends. He was voted 51st of the 100 greatest stand-up comedians of all time by Comedy Central in 2004; and was voted 5th in Comedy Central's Stand Up Showdown in 2008 and 11th in 2010
####
Below, see this hilarious clip from Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Lewis Black hilariously tackles America's obsession with health, mocking the absurdity of paying crazy amounts for bottled H2O. He brilliantly roasts the trend, reminding us just how ridiculous it is to buy what’s basically tap water in a fancy bottle.